we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
