This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
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