Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
Randomize
