and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
40s are totally the cure
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
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