the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Randomize
