One girl and one boy is just not enough.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
Randomize
