I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Randomize