You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
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