It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
Do I have a sign around my neck that says "SWM desperately seeking ultra-plus-size woman that likes everything I do"? I swear they're organized
No, but you do have a sign around your neck that says "Free cupcakes."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
I will be naked everywhere
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
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