What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
last night I used snow as a chaser
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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