you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
did i walk over a car last night?
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
Randomize
