Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Randomize