1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
Enjoy the penises
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
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