lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize