Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
my being single is dangerous.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
Randomize
