Nicole vs. Life
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Do you have feelings for this penis?
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
