For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
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