I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
Randomize