it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
Randomize
