i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
Randomize
