Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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