He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
Randomize
