I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
Randomize
