$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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