I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
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Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
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you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize