I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
Randomize