Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
Randomize
