Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
Randomize