It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
