thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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