Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
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