WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
The air was thick with penises
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
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