fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Randomize