I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
