i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
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