$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
Randomize
