have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
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