Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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