I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
Fun fact: You might be drunk if your vision is so blurry that you almost ask "do you know where my glasses are?" while you're wearing them.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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