Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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