even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
