used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Randomize
