im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
Randomize
