Texts From Last Night

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  (614): View more from Ohio

  ...is it true? will i see you next weekend

  (248): View more from Michigan

  YES.

  (614): View more from Ohio

  ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us

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  (614): ...is it true? will i see you next weekend (248): YES. (614): ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us http://tfl.nu/m1xt
  Replies (22) Good night (3578) Bad night (1017)
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  (321): View more from Florida Space Coast

  you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..

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  (321): you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night.. http://tfl.nu/r63d
  Replies (19) Good night (5799) Bad night (674)
• Favorite

  (224): View more from Illinois

  i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.

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  (224): i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study. http://tfl.nu/7goo
  Replies (14) Good night (4121) Bad night (893)
• Favorite

  (614): View more from Ohio

  over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?

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  (614): over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read? http://tfl.nu/2tdc
  Replies (13) Good night (2690) Bad night (762)
• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??

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  (978): Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"?? http://tfl.nu/v3ie
  Replies (19) Good night (3214) Bad night (2060)
• Favorite

  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.

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  (202): At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us. http://tfl.nu/d8nu
  Replies (7) Good night (4763) Bad night (848)
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  (716): View more from New York

  I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.

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  (716): I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing. http://tfl.nu/wqpy
  Replies (7) Good night (4126) Bad night (1041)
• Favorite

  (250): View more from British Columbia

  Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"

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  (250): Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole" http://tfl.nu/hdok
  Replies (11) Good night (1252) Bad night (2651)
• Favorite

  (386): View more from Florida

  I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.

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  (386): I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again. http://tfl.nu/wsfw
  Replies (13) Good night (1818) Bad night (1582)
• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.

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  (508): in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar. http://tfl.nu/rqsf
  Replies (9) Good night (1413) Bad night (2370)
• Favorite

  (408): View more from California

  Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission

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  (408): Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission http://tfl.nu/3kcn
  Replies (6) Good night (1957) Bad night (558)
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight

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  (631): ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight http://tfl.nu/dytu
  Replies (29) Good night (2610) Bad night (551)
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.

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  (714): Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock. http://tfl.nu/bwd8
  Replies (40) Good night (5383) Bad night (1005)
• Favorite

  (810): View more from Michigan

  I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.

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  (810): I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me. http://tfl.nu/noof
  Replies (10) Good night (552) Bad night (1554)
• Favorite

  (317): View more from Indiana

  He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.

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  (317): He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life. http://tfl.nu/c0aw
  Replies (6) Good night (295) Bad night (1498)

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