Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Randomize
