As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
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What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
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