I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Randomize
