Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
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