how can u be prego again
I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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