the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
I touched a dick in church today
Randomize
