i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
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